More Fun With Kids

Little A: Mom, I know why my fish game needs “C” batteries.

Mom: Why’s that?

Little A: ‘Cause it’s a SEA game!

S: I need my hairbrush.

Little A.: I need my hairbrush.

S: Stop it!

Little A: Stop it!

S: Will you stop copying me?

Little A: Will you stop coffee-ing me?

Little A: I have a joke.

Mom: Okay.

Little A: What did the peach say to the watermelon?

Mom: I don’t know. What?

(Pause.)

Little A: Actually, I have another joke.

S: If you take out his middle initial, Little A.’s initials spell ‘AC.’ Like—‘Ack!!!’

Mom: What did you do on the playground today?

Little A: (enthusiastically) My friends and I played the Potty Game!

Mom: (cautiously) What’s the Potty Game?

Little A: (beaming) Some of us are pee-pee and some of us are poopies…

Mom bites lip, waits for it in dread.

Little A: And we go to the top of the twisty slide and pretend we’re going down the pipes!

Mom breathes again.

[In the interests of full disclosure, his teacher did encourage the children to keep the potty words for the bathroom. They’re now playing ants going down the pipes.]